Thursday, April 18, 2013

Look and See What They See!


by William Cowles

Recently, I was reminded of the difficulty we have seeing our “living spaces” with fresh eyes.  We get so used to certain things being the way they are, we quit noticing when something is off-putting. Often, it takes an outsider looking in to point out the offensive clutter, figuratively and literally, in our environments.  And our churches can be the most blind.

That’s why I fully agree with the observations of former church pastor and dedicated insider, Shaun King. Now that he’s on the outside looking in, he sees a lot of things that insiders miss. Do you have the objective perspective to see some of the problem areas that outsiders see when they visit your church? If not, many church searchers will get turned off and not come back.

Here’s a quick paraphrasing of seven of his 10 Honest Observations of Church Now that I am an Outsider, and you can read it all at http://www.shauninthecity.com/2013/03/the-outside-view-of-a-former-church-insider-10-honest-observations.html. After he has his say, I’ve got three to add to his list – you probably do, too!

1.        Most church nurseries stink. They smell like crap and instantly make me not want to drop my baby off there.
2.      I’ve gotten lost in every church I’ve ever attended. I can’t find the bathrooms, I can’t find where to drop off the kids, and when I find the bathrooms and where to drop off the kids, I can’t find my way back to my seat.  
3.      The sermons are rarely memorable. I won’t tell you where we went last, but I can’t tell you even one sentence from the sermon and I listened the whole doggone time.
4.      Kids rule. Parents will go to a church that they like just a little bit if the kids LOVE it, but parents will leave a church they like a lot if the kids don’t like it.  
5.      They act as though they own their members. I’ve had a few pastors act really weird over their church members volunteering to help with something I was leading outside of the church.  I’m not going to start a church with them.  Don’t be weird and don’t act so insecure fellas.
6.      Announcements are annoying. Don’t have an announcement video, then an announcement flyer, then have the pastor restate all of the announcements, then have a host come do it at the end. Cut almost all of it out. Do it once and have a flyer.  
7.       I feel like I’m going back in time when I go to most churches. Listen, I know God is unchanging, but the world changes. I hate to say this, but when I visited some churches, it felt just like it did when I visited them 10 years ago and gave me very little motivation to go back.

I agree with all of that – but, wait, there’s more! Here are three I find most vexing and common in my church searcher visits:

1.        The “Welcome” desk isn’t. Instead, it’s either a storage pile or a social hangout for friends of each other. If visitors aren’t welcome, don’t pretend they are.
2.      Leaders don’t introduce themselves. People just stand up and start talking or singing or reading. Tell me who you are, what you’re doing there, and why I should listen to you. It’s just common courtesy.
3.      The place is a mess. I’ve seen garbage cans beside the main doors. I’ve seen piles of old office equipment in a chapel. I’ve had to walk around stacks of unused chairs to get down the hall. Is this the way you live? Clean it up – company is coming!

So what do you see, hear, or smell that might turn off and turn away a visitor at your church? Get someone who doesn't know you to look at your church through a fresh set of eyes. It could be one of the most revealing things you’ve ever done to improve the welcoming environment at your church.

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