Why the Kids Aren’t Going to Church!

by Reba Collins

So, you don’t understand why the “kids”* today don’t go to church? Don't panic, it’s a familiar lament of Baby Boomer parents, and the subject of discussion by research organizations, professional church planters, pastors, and church leaders around the country.

Clearly, churches have a lot to ponder, discuss, and discern if they intend to be good choices for younger adults. Too much, actually. So, here are some of the cultural issue insights I gleaned from recent conferences hosted by the Barna Group (www.barna.org) and Exponential (www.exponential.org):

• People live in a complicated world and Christianity doesn’t seem to answer complicated questions in a deep, thoughtful, or challenging way.
• The dream of Millennials includes social responsibility and impact.
• People, Christians included, know they don’t have to go to church to experience spirituality.
• The “church” is no longer the third place in people’s lives. It is not a “place” at all.
• Young people are being raised to create their own communities around sports, school, social media, and recreational activities.
• We live in the participant era
• Millennials are marrying later (5-8 years) and having children outside of marriage more (41%).
• A cause is worth the sacrifice of time, money, and talent.
• Millennials are not a generation you can teach at; they want hard questions and discussions.
• Young people are bi-vocational; Young Christians want to be multi-vocational with faith, cause, and career.

These cultural issues clearly are spilling over into our church communities and perceptions of “church:”

• A “church” is now considered a group of people rather than a location.
• Young Christians may leave the institutional church, but are not leaving their faith in Christ.
• People are looking to access their spirituality not just on Sunday morning in a particular building, but Monday through Saturday everywhere they are.
• People want the challenge of daily discipleship, but not the weekly programs of discipleship.
• Young Christians know that church activities are NOT the gatekeepers to true community or spiritual growth.
• Christian community is the product of the people assembled, not the authority of the church.
• Young Christians are creating community wherever they are.

So what does this all look like in practical terms for church leaders who want to become good church choices for this generation and the next?

• Focus on what you want people to be and not what you want them to know. Experiential discipleship trumps educational discipleship.
• “Love your neighbor as you love yourself” is the standard by which churches are measured. Know your neighbors and care for them -- ask nothing in return.
• Help people deploy their faith in their sphere of influence at work, home, and play.
• Relationships are the key to influence.
• Offer a vision that requires attention to someone or some issue bigger than the church itself. The right actions really do speak louder than the right words or music.
• Be present for people and share yourselves – not your programs and activities – but yourselves.
• Christians who live an accessible life make Christ accessible to others.

Churches need to come to grips with these, and other, cultural and spiritual shifts. Today, behaviors overshadow beliefs. Relationships trump religious systems. In many ways, those outside the church have turned the tables on people inside the church. They are asking churches, “Are you living like Jesus?” And if you are not, you will not be an acceptable choice to partner with on their faith journey.

* Millennial generation: people born between 1977 and 1992.