Is Advent a Big Turn-Off?

Will your church's Advent invitation turn someone off to Christmas?

Why are the candles different shapes, sizes and colors?

You heard me. Will your Advent invitation turn someone off to Christmas? You’re probably thinking: How can one of the most joyful times of the year be a turn-off to people? And there’s the problem with an Advent invitation. We think everyone feels Advent is a joyful, celebratory time of the year. We offer an Advent invitation assuming the ones we’re inviting hold the same Advent feel-good thoughts and experiences we do. Well, the reality is that many people don’t know what to think, feel, or anticipate from an Advent experience.

Many churches joyfully are inviting people to their “Advent activities,” and encouraging their members to invite friends to Advent activities. The problem is, we forget that the people we want to be there – people who don’t normally attend church – may have no idea what “Advent” means or why it’s meaningful to them. An invitation to Advent, then, becomes more intimidating than inviting.

We’ve all felt similar apprehensions when an invitation is made. We’ve all felt intimidated by an invitation regardless of the enthusiasm from which it is given.

Have you ever been invited to someone else’s family tradition? Your invitation comes with great celebratory enthusiasm, and it’s obviously exciting to the person who invited you. This is THE event every family member puts on the calendar. It even has its own name. Problem is you don’t know what to expect because you’re not “in the family.” So you start to ask a few questions. What is this celebration for exactly? What do you do at it? What should I bring? Wear? Will other guests be there? Are you sure it’s okay for me to come? 

Once you’ve gotten an initial idea of what to expect, you feel comfortable accepting the invitation. After all, you want to meet some living legends, and Grandma’s famous pie does sound delicious. But you’re still going to be a little apprehensive until you’ve been welcomed by the family, and the celebration goes just as your friend described it. With the knowledge and comfort from your shared experience, you left probably hoping for an invitation to their next family tradition.

Advent to church people is a “family tradition.” Advent season was started by church people for church people. But, it may not be familiar, comfortable, or inviting to someone who’s looking at what you’re doing from the outside in.

Many outsiders don’t know what Advent means, let alone what to expect. Let’s remember, then, that people outside your church family will have some basic questions about your invitation. They’ll want to know: What is Advent? Who can participate? What’s expected? Why do you celebrate this way? 

Bottom line, it’s just intimidating when we’re invited into a situation where a group of people share common experiences, stories and traditions that we don’t.  

What can your church family do to prepare people you want invite to your Advent celebration? What can your church family do to welcome guests and build a sense of anticipation in them for the next family celebration, Christmas? In this season of joyful anticipation, anticipate the questions and concerns of those you’re inviting to your Advent celebration. Help them to anticipate not only the birth of Christ, but all of the other celebrations of our Christian family.