And Nobody Cared.

by William Cowles 

I visited Your Church* last Sunday. And nobody cared. 

I walked in unannounced because I wanted to find God. And nobody noticed that I was there. The people gathered in the foyer didn’t see me come in. The pastor didn’t notice that I was sitting all alone. The people in surrounding seats looked right through me. Nobody cared.

Who was I? 

• I was the surrogate for a breadwinner who just lost his job.
• I was the stand-in for a cancer patient who just received a terminal diagnosis.
• I was the scout for a young family looking for a safe, nurturing church family to help raise their children.
• I was the lonely, hopeless soul who thought that maybe I was the kind of person Jesus sought out to comfort, heal, and love. 

I was the person looking for God and I thought I could find him in Your Church. I was the visitor expecting to be seen, welcomed, and accepted by the family of Jesus Christ. I was wrong. 

It’s not the first time this has happened to me. In fact, it happens most of the time when I visit an established mainline church for the first time. There are good and wonderful people in Your Church. They’ve known each other for a long time. They love each other. They care for each other. Their Church is for themselves and each other; but not for someone like me and my kind. The sad fact is that, in many older established churches, visitors just aren’t expected, so even the best-dressed, best-behaved strangers look intimidating when they do appear.  

It’s a pretty predictable pattern, I’ve learned. When the regulars see me – a stranger – they are surprised and confused. They don’t recognize me, and they think it’s possible they just don’t remember me, so they don’t approach me. They don’t want to offend me, so they don’t risk speaking to me. They don’t know how to start a conversation, so they don’t sit near me. They think it’s someone else’s job to welcome visitors. (Isn’t there a committee for that?)

It’s sad that so many “good” Christians don’t know how to be like Jesus in the place that lost, lonely, hurting, needy people come to find Jesus – Your Church.

And, do you care? I hope so. When your church doesn't care about visitors, people will stop visiting your church.

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* “Your Church” is a pseudonym for a real, mainline Protestant church in a small northeastern city that I visited recently. It will remain anonymous because it is not too different from many of its cousin churches throughout the US. It doesn’t need to be called out by name and location; you know who it is and where it is. It’s your church.